Sunday, June 16, 2019

Cerene's Retirement Party

Working in a large organization, you get used to attending baby showers, wedding showers and retirement parties.  And last Friday, many of us gathered in the morning to celebrate Cerene’s retirement.

By inference then, you should know that Cerene has worked at Surrey Place for a damn long time. You should also know that Cerene may be many things, but she is definitely not serene; and lastly, you should know that Cerene was diagnosed, out of the clear blue, with 4th stage cancer just over a month ago.  And so, last Friday, that one word – retirement – was heavy with meanings and emotions that are not usual to it.
Some of us lined the hall leading to the room, waiting in anticipation, as one would for a dignitary.  Others, sat in the meeting room designated for the occasion, waiting.  I expected to hear sadness, to hear a few words spoken by the guest of honour about beginnings and endings, chapters and turnings, sadness tinged with hope for the new things to come, talk of bitter-sweetness and doors opening-closing.  I expected someone would remind everyone how wonderful it has been to work with Cerene, how lucky we have been, what a fount of knowledge or pillar of strength she was and will be.  How those strengths can now be directed into activities of family, community and in pursuit of interests, perhaps, put aside for decades.
Apparently, Cerene had not seen that memo or read the script; Or if she had, she must have promptly burned one, the other, or both.
As soon as she made her entrance, Cerene jumped into the deep end of Dolly Parton’s, “Eagle When She Flies,” a song played at her party, by her own request.  Nothing was as expected.  She was not as much singing the lyrics as she spoke them with a depth that was confusing then discomforting.  What to make of this woman that we knew and didn’t know and were about to get to know?
Cerene came to celebrate, to laugh, to reminisce, to scold, to humble, to humour, to cry, to make us cry, to teach and to preach.  Cerene taught us that it’s okay to be fully yourself with no apologies.  She came to show that dressing to the nines – black gown, gold high-heeled shoes and hair done – is okay even at 9:30 in the morning.  Just because.
She said, ‘remember, employees are people and not just numbers; that changes in our work place are a chance to re-tool, transform and most of all, to be bold.’  I heard, ‘move forward,’ as she is doing, with eyes wide open, even with trepidation, but hopeful; above all, hopeful.  By action: do not be afraid to show, not share, just show, your faith; and reveal something of yourself because it gives others permission to also be fully themselves.
And then, she danced!  A song solely chosen by her, for her.  Some clapped along, some cried and Cerene, with eyes closed and hands raised high, praised God and showed us what fortitude and forbearance and just plain not-giving-a-damn-‘cause-life-is-too-short, looked like.  Life affirmed.
Out of breath, she sat, and it was clear that the cancer has indeed taken its toll.  Not plainly seen, not yet anyways, it still made itself manifest.  There was no time for chit-chat and small words.  Cerene needed to leave; nurse’s orders.
She asked someone to cue up a song, her extro music.  She left the room as she had entered, on her own terms, by her command.  She left us all to finally get back on-script with our cheese and crackers.  And she did the one thing no number of team building exercises have ever done, she brought us all closer together.
And the lyrics of that Dolly Parton song?
Her heart's as soft as feathers
Still she weathers stormy skies
And she's a sparrow when she's broken
But she's an eagle when she flies

5 comments:

Ana said...

Damn. This was beautiful. I'm sad I missed it. Thanks for capturing it in words, even a little.

Zap said...

Thanks for dropping by Ana.

Valerie said...

Wow. You captured all the beautifully. Thanks for sharing Zap, I feel like I was there. Valerie T

Zap said...

Thanks Val!

Unknown said...

well said, Zap. Sensitive and astute. I am in Nova Scotia now and had no idea about Cerene, and we worked at SPC for decades together. Thank you for acknowledging her.