Seven Weird Things About Me

1. I pee sitting down, especially at home. But, when outside, it's every man for himself! Why you may ask? One word -- splatters. Pee splatters people. Ick. So sit down and shut up!
2. I'm wracked.
3. Sometimes, when I am making an appointment with a client after completing an hour long meeting with them, I draw a blank when writing the client's name in my date book. Blank. Totally blank. Why?
4. I have a recurring fantasy which involves a clean, quiet hotel room, a delicious pizza, a good movie, a hot bath and uninterrupted sleep through the night. That's it. Weird, n'est-ce pas?
5. I married a woman whose ancestors were forcibly shipped from Africa to the New World hundreds of years ago. She is Black, Christian and was born in Jamaica. She was raised in Canada and studied at the same primary school, junior high and high school as me. We also studied and graduated, at the same time, from the same university. Okay, not weird. Maybe just interesting. But here is the weird part: She's Jamaican and she's never once, god bless her, waved a fully loaded gun in my face! Weird, huh?
6. I once spent an hour in an isolation tank -- voluntarily.
7. I watched The Pink Panther Strikes Again the other day. I saw the film twice in the late '70s, but found that I remembered every line and even the incidental music throughout the movie. Weird? Please see # 3.

Go Figure!

Average number of cigarettes I would have smoked since quitting:
1,111

Number of cigarettes actually smoked:
6

Amount spent on buying cigarettes since quitting:
$5.00

Approximate amount I would have spent if I hadn't quit smoking:
$400.07

Rest Your Eyes

Source: brainmotel

Bored by school, boys turn violent

Source: Toronto Star
January 19, 2008
BY JIM COYLE

A man does something for 34 years, he gets to know a thing or two.

Clyde Chamberlain is a Toronto native, a high-school teacher. He's the curriculum leader of sciences at Marc Garneau Collegiate Institute. He's seen a lot of kids come and go since obtaining his own master's degree in chemistry and bachelor of education in the '70s.

He's become increasingly worried by escalating youth violence in the city and in the ways the education system is letting kids down. A lot of it, he thinks, has got to do with the way some students – especially boys – learn.

"I believe that many of these troubled youths have few options of interest offered by the school system," Chamberlain said.

When he went to high school, Chamberlain took a five-year science, technology and trades program. Since then, the province has dismantled most of the tech-school programs in the province, he says.

"Most shops lie dormant or have been changed to classrooms. Hands-on activities are downplayed by parents and schools at the high-school level. How many kids nowadays have hobbies that involve design and construction in their teenage years?"

Increasingly, the education system is geared to academics, he said. Parents push many children to university "where they don't belong." Meanwhile, trade programs are less available, even though they feed co-op and apprenticeship programs and Ontario has a shortage of skilled workers.

Technology courses should mean more than just computers, he said. There should be drafting, machine shop, automotive, welding, electronics, sheet metal, carpentry and such. Many of the students he's taught, who might have been attracted to gangs and crime, became involved in trades and now own their own businesses because they had an opportunity to take industrial arts and shop, he said.

There is a growing body of research that supports Chamberlain's observations.

In his book, Boys Adrift, the psychologist Leonard Sax recalled the drawing, painting, singing, dancing – in short, the tactile experience – that used to mark kindergarten.

"Nowadays, it's all about learning to read and write," he said.

Kids are expected to sit still and be quiet. But the male brain develops at a different speed than the female, he said. Boys lack the capacity for the sedentary. The young male brain tends toward spatial-mechanical learning.

Boredom and frustration are no small problem. Research shows that girls will generally do homework because the teacher asked them. Boys will do it only if it interests them.

In The Minds of Boys: Saving Our Sons from Falling Behind in School and Life, Michael Gurian concurs about the mismatch in how boys learn and how schools are set up.

"Boys who were once schooled in various bonding and instructional methods – apprenticeships, tutoring, action and practice through works of the hand – are now learning through one primary method (verbal learning groups) and without physical movement (sitting in chairs.)"

Daily experiential learning on farms or in marketplaces has nearly disappeared, he said. While fidgeting and physical movement – once a show of energy and vitality – have become liabilities.

As for Chamberlain, he says, "trades must be an option not only because they provide the students with lifelong occupations, but also they enrich their personal lives."

He asked for comments about his proposal. But what's to say? A man does something for 34 years, he gets to know a thing or two.

Jim Coyle usually appears Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday.

Winterlicious is Back

It's cold and dreary outside and Toronto is celebrating indoors with Winterlicious. Today is the first day for frenziedly dialing the numbers to fine restaurants all over the city for a chance to eat normally expensive meals from a prix-fixe menu.

Normally, I just drive through and order combo #3...but on January 25th, I will be donning my ascot, waxing my moustache and polishing my nails. What, What!

Last year we went to the Corner House Restaurant and had a great time. This year, we wanted to go to Canoe, which is located at the top of one of the TD Towers. A magnificent view of the city and great food...enough to make a gourmand and a bon vivant out of anyone - even a peasant like me. However, the official sponsor to Winterlicious (American Express) gives their card holders the perquisite of being able to harass fine restaurants ahead of untouchables like you and me.

We have settled on going to Millie's Bistro. Millie is a good, nay, better than most, cooks and the atmosphere is nice (I am told by the wife).

So, what are you waiting for? Go out and get stuffed!

Linda Carter Twirls and Transforms

Another delicious throwback. This time it is Linda Carter twirling,twirling, her way to justice as Wonder Woman. Love the theme song, the lasso sound effects and her not-very-authoritative "interrogation" of the bad guy.

Quicker Than The Human Eye

And what blog would be complete without the addition of the theme song and images from that wonderful Saturday morning show -- Hong Kong Phooey! Number-one-super-guy! Enjoy!

Korg 70,000 B.C.

What can I say, except that I was a sucker for Korg and his family of Neanderthals. Does anyone else remember watching this fine show on Saturday mornings. Is that a Shofar being blown? Whose Shofar was it, Mara's, Korg's or the other mouth breathers? Who knows and who cares! What a blast from the past!!

Gorilla Speaks To Mankind

I have just stumbled onto the funniest blog I have yet seen!

The blog, Japing Ape, is written by a Mr. Gorilla Bananas, a Lowland Gorilla by the looks of him, who writes from the Congo. This precocious little monkey (and let's not get into the whole monkey-gorilla debate) also gives credit to Dr. Larson Whipsnade, "my business partner and English tutor."

The Author's hobbies include eating, sleeping and mating. The blog is regularly commented on by some equally wacky characters such as Dr. E. Scientist, phD., Tarzan and Mynah Bird, to name just a few. The postings are funny, but the comments which follow guarantee one yuck after another.

Here's an excerpt:

Why this blog?
Warmest Greetings to all my naked little primate cousins in cyberspace. Let me introduce myself. I am a mature male gorilla who mis-spent many years of his youth with a travelling circus, performing tricks for your kiddies and pulling rude faces at your grannies. Although the work was as boring as hell, it gave me the chance to observe closely what you big-headed ape-men call “civilization”. Don’t get wrong. I am no enemy of your species and have many human friends whom I visit from time to time. My only wish is to offer you some friendly advice from an outside perspective. Like when you humans pay someone you don’t know to listen to all your personal problems and tell you it’s not your fault because someone groped you when you were a child. Only in this case it’s free. A gorilla with a harem and an unlimited supply of fruit and veg has no need for money.

Now, what is the problem with your lives? Well, it seems to me, my hairless little chums, that you have lost touch with reality. Instead of living, you talk about living, and even talk about people who do nothing but talk about living. A lot of you, for example, spend hours and hours reading story books. Now the stories may be full of action, with fighting, and mating, and fighting about mating. But reading about this stuff is no substitute for actually doing it. If you were really doing what you were reading about, there would be NO NEED to read about it! Reading about it is just a way of imagining you are doing it when you’re not! All this unreality leads to what you humans call the “stress of modern living”. But I call it the “DISTRESS of modern living”. You skulk about with long faces, repressing the universal primate instinct to dance from place to place while shaking your backsides and fondling each other. We hairy apes have an unkind description for you: UPRIGHT AND UPTIGHT.

So the aim of this blog is to help you to unwind and laugh at yourselves. And if my efforts in this direction cause just one of you to loosen up and discover the inner ape struggling to get out, it will all have been worthwhile.

Pull Your Pants Up!

On December 27, 2007, a family of six people were arrested at a mall in Wellington, according to the Palm Beach Post.

Six members of a family were arrested at The Mall at Wellington Green in an incident that began benignly enough over a pair of droopy jeans but ended like a chaotic scene out of the Cops TV show.

An estimated 20 deputies, two canine units and a police helicopter swarmed the area surrounding the mall's food court, shutting down roads, all to arrest a 52-year-old man, his 50-year-old wife and four other relatives, ages 16 to 20, Thursday evening.

The fracas began around 7 p.m. Thursday when deputies arrested Frantz Leger, the Legers' 20-year-old son. He had returned to the mall where he was banned for violating its "Rules of Common Courtesy" on or around August. The Florida State University sophomore business major was verboten for wearing his pants too low.

"I know I'm not a criminal just because my pants are too low below your expectations," Frantz Leger said from his Wiltshire Village home Saturday.

"The mall doesn't put up with that tomfoolery bullcrap," (Palm Beach County sheriff's Lt. Jay Hart said). "His pants were down below his butt. No one goes to the mall and wants to see the crack of someone's butt."

Right On!

Seth and Abbas

Frank Herbert Speaks To Me

"I must not fear. Fear is the mind-killer. Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration. I will face my fear. I will permit it to pass over me and through me. And when my fear is gone I will turn and face fear's path, and only I will remain."