Buying a Ticket as a VIP

I decide to treat myself to the latest Clint Eastwood movie, The Mule, by going to a VIP theatre.  Basically, the seats recline, are a little wider and the popcorn (the same damn popcorn you would get at the peasant seating theatre) is delivered to your seat as if at a fine restaurant.

So i'm standing in line to buy my ticket behind a past-his-prime man (so just like me); except he is wearing under his Hilfiger V-neck sweater a collared shirt.  And the aforementioned collars on the aforementioned shirt are up, pointing skywards.  A religious man, perhaps.  And, he is in deep negotiations with the one attendant selling tickets today.

I wait.  I look at my phone and find no help there.  I hear things: "G7, but can I get H7 too?"

The attendant says, "No. H7 is taken."

"But I looked online and it was free?"

The attendant's will collapses and he calls a higher power by whispering into his neck.  Something is confirmed.  Decisions are made.  Information is transacted.  The attendant says, "L7 is open and so is L6, do you want those seats?"

"L7 is too high up.  Let me check." After which the collared man gets on his phone to call (I don't know) maybe his manager.

A few Letter-Number combos get thrown around.  I look out the window and murmur, "You sunk my battleship."  I am amused.

Finally, the deal is closed with the proper combination of seats, I think, being bought.

My turn: I look at the attendant and he looks not in the least bothered by his previous customer.  I say, "What did that guy think he was doing, buying an airline ticket?"

Attendant: "Pardon?"

"That guy.  Did he think he was buying a plane ticket or something?"

Now we're talking the same language.  Attendant says, "That happens all the time."

Me: "Okay, sooo, I want a ticket on the aisle, can you do that?"

The attendant starts looking at his terminal and points out a seat.  I say, "Okay, as long as it's right behind the pilot."  Small chuckle from the attendant.  Maybe he's heard all this before; but this is all new to me and at the end of the day, my amusement needs matter more than his.  Apparently.

"Do you have a Scene Card, sir?"

I say, "I'm Indian...of course I have a Scene Card."  Badum-bum. He smiles.  My kids would have taken flight before this last comment.  I am amused.  Again.

I take my ticket, thank my travel agent and leave to grab a coffee before the in-flight entertainment begins.