Having left home early at 3 a.m. Having been to the airport, begged, walked half way to Saskatchewan to find the luggage storage place, taken a mistaken cab ride and then another cab ride, had I must admit, left me a bit of a wreck. I kept telling myself that I would accept whatever became the outcome of this fiasco. That I was doing something, logically, steadily and not compounding my initial error. Deep breath, neck stretches, smoke, coffee...things which are diametrically opposed to each other but comforting nevertheless.
In order to complete the passport application I needed two references. Moreover, I needed two people who could be contacted by the passport office to verify my identity or I couldn't get my passport. I know plenty of people but they are mostly nine-to-fivers. I thought of my friend Tracey O. (at home on maternity leave) put her down and put the name of my Supervisor, Brigid, down. I called Tracey, she was not home, left her a message to call me back asap. Now I remembered that Brigid no longer works on Mondays....crap! I had to come up with two people and two people who would be readily available so the passport clerk would not have a difficult time getting through and verifying my details. I couldn`t use any relatives: they`re all out of town at a secret compound learning how to build tiny but powerful bombs.
My friends at work, I thought. I tried several people without luck, then it occurred to me: Technically, the ladies who work at the main office with my agency have known me for a little more than three years, and, they work at their desks and are not out and about meeting clients.
So back I went on the cell phone. Claudette, the receptionist, laughed and kept asking me if I was pulling her leg. "No," I said. "I'm not kidding." I asked the ladies in accounting and HR to vouch for me and without missing a beat, Madeleine and Kerry said yes. Lots of ribbing and laughter at my expense, but damn, they came through for me.
My number in the line for hapless people with passport forms properly filled out was 139. The board was at 121. So, again, time to kill. Fortunately, my comfort food was in the same plaza as the passport office...so off I went to McDonald's. I didn't really feel like eating but I knew it would be a bad idea to continue running around on sugar, caffeine and nicotine. In retrospect, sitting down for thirty minutes was a good idea.
I then made my way back to the passport office. The number on the board was 127. I took a seat with the alongside the other restless, sad-faced people. 45 minutes later, I was finally standing in front of Filipina passport agent. She looked to be 18 years old but was totally on the ball. She understood exactly what I was telling her. In fact, she took my two sentence story in without blinking. So I sez to her, "I'm not sure you understand my situation. I missed my flight at 6:45 this morning..." She cut me off and told me I would be able to get my passport within an hour.
"Thank you," I said to her. "Thank you so much!" She just nods and says, "You're welcome." Just like that, 'you're welcome." I paid my $187.00 for a five year passport gratefully.
So now I had an hour to kill. Assured that I would get my damn passport, I went downstairs into the plaza and tried (tried but failed) to relax.
Exactly an hour later, I had my shiny, new passport in hand.
Now to re-book my ticket. Being a day from hell this was not as easy as it sounds. I stayed on the phone with a Gandhian travel rep for 30 minutes while she checked various times and dates, different partner airlines, pricing, and on and on. I finally ended up being transferred to Delta Airlines to arrive in Fort Lauderdale through Atlanta at 9 p.m. My original ticket would have had me arrive at 3 p.m.
My last cab driver had handed me a business card with his cab company's phone number on it. Naturally, I called the same cab only to be told by the dispatcher that I was calling from Mississauga and the cab company in question was based in Brampton and therefore could not pick me up to go to the airport. While on hold on my cell phone with the airline rep, I dialled 411 from a public phone. Got the number for a Mississauga cab company and called them to get me to the airport.
It was 12:50 p.m. by this time and my flight was scheduled to depart at 3:05 p.m. Recommended check-in time for flights to the U.S. is two hours prior to departure Time crunch...the cab showed up at 1 p.m. I got in the cab and tried to use the time to relax. Sure, yeah - relax. Also, called my wife at her work to let her know I was officially fucked. She wasn`t at work. She had to leave early because my son was apparently sick and his school had asked her to pick him up. The little guy had thrown-up twice already.
So off to the airport I went. Onwards Blixen, onwards Rudolph, Onwards Karim...drive damn you, drive!
More mayhem to follow at the airport with Homeland Security...
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